Gaslighters use a range of ‘techniques’ to execute their control, including:
Pretending not to understand when they do – they may pretend to completely misunderstand what you are saying or doing, despite the fact that you are being very transparent and clear in your actions or motives.
Labelling your thoughts as crazy or imagined – a person gaslighting you may tell you things like, ‘that never happened’. For instance, they may say one thing to you on a particular day and the following day, vehemently deny ever saying it.
Questioning the other person’s memory of events when they remember correctly – in a similar vein as above, they may continually question your version of events until you doubt them yourself.
Pretending to forget what actually occurred when you actually remember – this also falls in line with the other two points. You may recall clearly an event, while they may flat out deny the event ever occurred.
Denying promises that you know they have made – gaslighters love to make promises to people only to deny they ever made them in the first place. It’s a classic mind game that leaves the recipient bewildered and confused.
Trivialising the other person’s feelings as being too sensitive when their reaction is somewhat normal.
Source: Lesley McPherson
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